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Burt Gummer:"Look, we arm ourselves, we set perimeters, we stand guard! Any of those snake things show up here, we make them extinct."

Valentine McKee:"Hey Rhonda, what do you think it's trying to do now?"
Rhonda LeBeck:"Why do you keep asking me?"

Burt Gummer:"Broke into the wrong god damn rec-room didn't you, you bastard!"

Earl Bassett:"What kind of fuse is that?"
Burt Gummer:"A cannon fuse."
Earl Bassett:"What the hell do you use it for?"
Burt Gummer:"A cannon."

Valentine McKee:"Who died and made you Einstein?!"

Valentine McKee:"We could make some real money on this thing. We could get in People magazine."
Earl Bassett:"People? Hell, National Geographic!"

Earl Bassett:"Is there some higher force at work here? I mean, are we asking too much of life?"

Valentine McKee:"I can't believe we said no to free beer!"

Valentine McKee:"Well I'll tell ya. Nobody handles garbage better then we do."

Valentine McKee:"What the hell is going on?! I mean what the hell is going on!?"

Valentine McKee:"What am I doing? I mean what's a woman like her want with a guy like me."

Earl Bassett:"Now listen to me! I'm older and I'm wiser!"
Valentine McKee:"Yeah, well your half right."

Valentine McKee:"Well, it just suddenly hit me. You know, stampede."

Valentine McKee:"What the hells in those things Bert?"
Burt Gummer:"A few household chemicals in the proper proportions."

Earl Bassett:"I ask you, is this a job for intelligent men?"
Valentine McKee:"Well show me one, I'll ask him."

Earl Bassett:"A murderer man! A real psycho! He's cutting people's heads off! I'm not kidding!"

Earl Bassett:"Hey Rhonda, you ever heard of anything like this before?"
Valentine McKee:"Oh sure Earl, everybody knows about them, we just didn't tell you. Oh hell man no one ever say anything like this! We're really onto something here!"

Valentine McKee:"Man, we decided to leave this place just one day too late you know."

Valentine McKee:"Could you shut up!"

Valentine McKee:"I got it, I got it. They're mutations caused by radiation. Or no no no, the government built them. Big surprise for the Russians."
Rhonda LeBeck:"Well there is nothing like them in the fossil record, I'm sure. Ok, so they pre-date the fossil record. That would make them a couple billion years old, and we just never seen one till now. Right."
Earl Bassett:"I vote for outer space. No way these are local boys."

Valentine McKee:"Now exactly how many cows are required for a stampede Earl? I mean, is it like 3 or more?"

Earl Bassett:"Well, haven't seen a sign for hours. It must be long gone."
Valentine McKee:"Yeah it must be. Why don't you take a little stroll and find out."

Rhonda LeBeck:"I'm Rhonda, Rhonda LeBeck. I'm up here for the semester."
Earl Bassett:"Yeah, geography."
Valentine McKee:"Geology."
Rhonda LeBeck:"Yeah well, actually seismology. Earthquakes. And you two must be Val and Earl. I've heard all about you."
Earl Bassett:"We deny everything."

Melvin:"Hey give me a gun! I'll take one!"
Burt Gummer:"I wouldn't give you a gun if it was world war 3!"

Rhonda LeBeck:"Did you notice anything weird a minute ago?"

Valentine McKee:"I know! I know! I'm working up to it!"

Burt Gummer:"You know if those college kids turn up oil or uranium or something out there. Next thing the feds will be at our door. Sorry, time to move. Eminent domain."
Heather Gummer:"Down honey, down."
Valentine McKee:"Yeah Burt, the way you worry, you'll have a heart attack before you get a chance to survive world war three."
Burt Gummer:"We'll see, we'll see."